yes i have discontinued Fury and I'm now working on another, tis untitled until i.... or you the reader gives it a name! so unless you want me to continue Fury tell me if not no more Fury posts. anyway this story there wont be much posting (not as frequently is what i mean) so Ronnie it may be long but i wont be posting all the time! So please enjoy!
Death. What a wonderful way to explain what was happening to me. I can't quiet explain it, i hurt all over and yet i was still being beaten. I was ready for the dark wave to wash over me, take me under and not bring me back up. But that would never happen, i was meant to suffer, made to face my father's drunken wrath. I couldn't hide, wasn't any use to he'd find me, always did. I looked in the mirror at today's beating; bruises on my arms and legs, the usual black eye and bleeding lip. Cuts and scars started from my face down to my legs.
I shuffled back to my room with the help of my dog Riku a big husky. He has the brightest blue eyes, he was very intelligent hid from my father and helped me to my room. I stopped halfway and grabbed Riku for support, my leg was throbbing and i was pretty sure it was broken. Father used a metal bat today and the sickening crunch in my leg told me i was right.
Riku whined and tried to hurry me to my room, i hobbled along gripping Riku's fur harder than necessary. As i got to my room i closed and locked the door, I sat down on my bed and rolled up my pants leg. "Can we drop the charade now? Let me have a look." Riku commanded.
My leg had swollen up connecting the bruises to make one big one. "Oh that's nice a new game to play! Connect the bruises!" I shouted sarcasm dripping. "I wish i was dead!" I cried.
"No, no honey its not your fault! We'll get through this." Riku promised. Riku was a shapeshifter he had been living with me for almost ten years, Riku shifted back to his normal human self. He had dark brown hair that stayed in a ponytail the band at the nape of his neck, blue eyes and he had on a red shirt and a black pair of jeans.
He crossed over and sat beside me, he put his arm around me and pulled me into his lap cradling me. "Yes i do! I want to die! I'm tired of living in fear, and in pain, every one's left me! And by the time i help you, you'll leave me to, just like everyone else." I shouted wishing i hadn't said the last part. Riku kissed the top of my head and held me tighter.
"I'll never leave you! Ever! Ria I...I'll never hurt you i swear. I'll always want you, always." Riku whispered.
"My leg hurts." I replied wincing as i shifted. Riku kissed my cheek and stood up being careful of my leg.
"I'll go get something! Will you be OK for twenty minutes?" Riku asked. Father wasn't due home for another hour or so i was sure to be safe. I nodded and Riku smiled and left out the window. Not five minutes later the door opened, i heard Father stumble in and call my name, i looked for something to block my door.
The door flew open sending me back into a wall, i groaned and tried to sit up. Father grabbed my shirt collar and pulled me to my feet, i stared into his cold gray eyes. He had been drinking i could smell the alchol on his breath, he grinned showing his disgusting yellowed teeth.
"What no greeting for your dad?" He slurred breath whirling around my head making me dizzy.
"Hello father." I greeted with fake cheerfulness. Without another word he threw me against the wall, my head hit and i heard a small crunching sound. Father began to scream profanities at me, as his fists and feet began connecting with my body.
I don't really remember the rest just the constant pain that blinded me, took a hold of me and drug me under the water. My breathing slowed, and i heard my pounding heart began to stop. I was dying from blood loss and i knew it, the last thing i heard was the sound of guns.
I didn't dream, why would a dead person dream? But i was thinking, I was thinking about Riku, how I'd never see him again. Didn't matter anymore why should it? I was dead, so what did dead people do anyway? I must've not been alone because i heard voices, it sounded a lot like Riku.
So i called to him, "Riku?" my voice sounded cracked, dry.
"She's waking up." I heard a female voice say. "That's right hold it tight keep pressure on it the bleeding'll stop." The woman said.
My eyes fluttered open and i stared into Riku's worried face. Riku leaned down and hugged me close to him. I smiled and kissed his cheek, "You had me so worried!" He shouted pulling me closer.
"Sorry." I mumbled. Riku let me go but let me rest my head in his lap, he sighed and i felt a slight pressure on my head. "My head hurts and there's a lot of pressure there..... why?" I asked feeling sleepy.
"When i came to get you... you were bleeding.... everywhere! He was so drunk, and he wouldn't stop beating you, you weren't even breathing. He shot at me and hit me in my arm. But i had to get you out of there, so i picked you up and ran i took you here to my village to get help." Riku closed his eyes and i knew.
"Riku... I'm so sorry!" I shouted tears running down my cheeks.
"Don't be its not your fault!" Riku protested.
Friday, April 25, 2008
untitled story
Posted by Rosebud at 9:17 PM
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9 Wolves:
not bad-a little animeish for my taste, but well written.
Do you have a comma phobia or something??? The lack of commas where there should be commas really destroyes my reading enjoyment. I can handle bad spelling and even bad grammer, but if there are more than 6 missing commas I go crazy.
*Mrs. Price would rip you apart.
Wow. Long read. It's really good though. I like it.
By the way, I agree with Ronnie on the anime stuff...it would be nice to read names that are in my language that I can comprehend. =]]]
srry everything i write deals with fantasy and i watch a lot of anime so my mind wanders a bit when i write fantasy! so its kinda like.... "Hey! this use this name! You havent used it in a while!" and so i kinda do, be glad i didnt name him Nightsky and her Moonsky (which i was origanlly going for) thxs i'll think about changing the names
you should name it "Super anime obsessed fan fic story of the white anime otaku* while simultaneously being half-japanese and half english and omitting several thousnad commas probably only to drive Ronnie completely insane"
*otaku is japanese for anime obsessed person (like you!)
SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!!!! I WILL NOT NAME IT THAT!!!! *runs away crying* kidding! but yea i love anime and i've always wanted to learn Japanese and visit there and learn about it! its just an intresting place! also i can sing a song in Japanese! so ha!
what's anime about it?! that's my question is it the names? or the fact that Riku's a shapeshifter or both? if its the names srry but i do try and shy away from anime names but i do tend to make them Japanese names for my love of Japan
Its the names and the overall air of it. You see, the lack of commas infers a fast pace picture-style right-left comic, and the wording has a slight japanese twing to it.
well i'm sorry! ok its not perfect! and i can't help it!!!! i'm sorry by the lack of commas! i just dont use them and i dont know why! but if its anime then i wont bother you or anyone else by posting up another story! i may just take this one down! its stupid and i hate it!!!!!
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