"It's time i do this, i see the best in people and its what I've always done." Emilen said holding onto Abel's hand. "I'm going to go look for my genealogy."
"You can go to the library for that." Abel responded.
Emilen shook her head and continued on, "Yes i know that but I'm going to go search for it on my own... ok not on my own Felix is coming because he's been wanting to do the same thing for years." At Abel's look she rushed on, "I need to know more about me! And since Rune isn't here i don't just want to see old newspaper clippings i want to meet my family! The ones that are still alive and i have a sibling not much older than me and i want to meet them."
"Why don't you want me to go?" Abel asked.
"Your going to college, if you haven't noticed Felix and i aren't really college material. I'm not even sure we'd last a second there!"
"So exactly how long will you be gone? And how much is that going to cost?" Abel questioned hoping she would just rather stay home.
"When Felix's parents died they didn't have any other kids besides Felix so he's very well off, and as for that I'm not sure... possibly a year seeing as were going to leave for Ireland in the morning and then possibly go the Amazons." Emilen murmured.
"A year?!" Abel shouted. "Emilen-"
"No don't! Listen first, ok i know this is going to be hard trust me its hard on me. And i know what your going to say about Felix!"
"He loves you!" Abel yelled.
"Yes i know and i love him but not in the same way i love you! He's the brother i never had and he knows that and understands that! Abel this is going to put a huge strain on our relationship but if we really love each other we'll work it out. Won't we?" Emilen whispered.
Abel pulled her into his lap and held her for a moment, "I love you Emilen more than words can say. You know we will, and you also know that i'm jealous. I know Felix isn't college material and the more i think about it you arent either. Write me and let me know how your doing ok?" Abel said.
"I'll call you to, i need to finish packing. Do you want to help?" Emilen asked. Abel nodded and gently kissed her before they headed off to her room to finish packing.
"Hey! Oh you going somewhere?" Phoenix asked as Emilen got the last of her shirts out of the drawer and threw them to Abel who organized them into her suitcase.
"Yeah, Felix and i are leaving tomorrow for Ireland we're searching for our family. I want to know who i was before i forgot and Felix wants to see if he has any other family members that are alive. Ever since his parents died he's been, well he thinks he's been the only child so he's very well off and he thinks that if he finds another sibling that he didnt know about he wants to meet them." Emilen smiled as Felix came in keys jangling from his pocket.
"Yep, are you packed?" Felix asked as he started over to the suitcase.
"Yeah, wait are we leaving now?" Emilen questioned staring at her clock. It was ten at night and a Sunday at that. Spring break was ending so people were sure to be coming home by now.
"Well yeah Spring break's ending and there's going to be a bunch of traffic in the morning and i'd like to get there before i turn thirty!" Felix laughed. Emilen smiled and nodded, Felix lugged Emilen's suitcase away and downstairs to the car.
"I'll miss you." Emilen whispered hugging Abel.
"Miss you to." He responded bending down to give her a kiss. Phoenix sighed and left leaving the couple to say their last good-bye for about a year. "Call me as soon as you get there, i want to know that your ok." She nodded and hugged him one more time before heading down stairs to hug Phoenix, Onyx and Cain good-bye.
"We'll miss you our little sunshine flower!" Cain responded.
"Dude.... that was super gay!" Onyx laughed. Cain knocked Onyx to his feet and placed his fist over his chest and covered it with his other hand as he bowed. "I'll kill you later!" Onyx responded getting up to hug Emilen.
"Don't kill my boyfriend! I'd like to have him back in one piece!" Phoenix cajoled. Onyx muttered something and sulked off to get some ice cream.
"We'll see you in about a year." Felix said as he and Emilen hopped in and drove off. Emilen looked back at the smiling faces everyone was there but Abel, when she looked up she saw him sitting on the window sill to his room waving her off. It was a picture of him she would always remember and never forget.
"Bye Abel... i love you." She whispered as Felix took a turn and they headed out of sight.
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Random Writing part 7
Friday, March 27, 2009
Random Writing part 6
It was sunny out and that meant practice for the whole house. Phoenix had come over earlier that day searching for Abel. When she found him she had challenged him to a duel and the two were outside with Onyx, Emilen and Felix. Cain had put his shoes on and was taken to the most remote place by Onyx and was going to travel more of the forest, his feet were also used to help him see and the only things he would be seeing were trees and the markers Onyx had put on the way so he could find his way back home.
Felix sat there Emilen curled around in his fur holding Cain's guitar. She strummed a bar and when Felix would close his eyes and his tongue would loll out she would do it again. Phoenix smiled and Abel charged her again this time catching her off guard. She fell onto her back as he pinned her down, his tongue lolled out and was dangerously close to her cheek. "Don't you dare!" She cried trying to push the heavy werewolf off her. "Abel! I mean it!" She yelled.
Abel's tongue touched her cheek and made a circuit from there to her hair. "Ew!" She shouted trying to get off. Abel barked a laugh and got off before Phoenix really killed him. Emilen chuckled and leaned back into Felix's fur. Felix laughed and gently prodded Emilen out, he gently licked her from her cheek to hair and she giggled.
"Closest you'll ever get to kissing her." Abel muttered. Phoenix turned and saw Abel had changed back into his pants and had his arms crossed over his bare chest.
"Be nice." Phoenix chidded. Abel sighed and waved her off before turning to leave, "Excuse us." He heard Phoenix say before she grabbed him by his arm and drug him off towards the house. "What was that all about?!" She cried once inside and the door had safely clicked shut.
"Does it matter?" Abel retorted.
"No! Not to her, but to you yeah! Your so jealous of him why is that?" She asked truly curious.
"I am not!"
"Oh stop being childish! Yes you are and you know it! Are you going to tell me or not?" She huffed. Abel sighed and flopped on the couch, "She chose you! You should be happy she didn't have to give you a second chance but she did. Abel ever since Rune you've been so jealous... maybe you've always been like that but i dont think you have. She finally remembers you'd think you'd be happy! But no! She is and your so jealous! Why is that?!
"It can't be... Oh." Phoenix whispered looking outside.
"Yeah 'oh' is right!" Abel growled.
"He would never take her. He loves her Abel but there so good for each other, dont make her choose because she'll only choose you because she's afraid you'll leave her. She loves him but maybe not in the same way as he loves her. Without her, he'd be in that hell hole every day... wanna know how i know that?" She questioned.
Abel nodded so Phoneix went on, "He told me. Said Cain could only help him so much, whenever she came here they took right to each other. You were off dealing with Kally and we understand that but he won't ruin the bond they have so that's why he basically punched you and yelled at you when we all knew you loved her. Maybe not the right way to go but i'm happy he's being assertive. Anyway he was the one who knew where Emilen was not Rune! Rune must have heard, he was trying to get in good with Onyx becuase Cain and Onyx are the strongest."
"Yeah they are, but he could have had her. I wanted them to be together." Abel replied.
"But you love her and she loves you! Don't ruin your happiness, they say love comes only once. I however think that's a bunch of bull! But that's just me. Abel you love her, she loves you and your together stop worrying about it! She's in safe hands and besides he was one of the first of us to really accept her. He would never try and take her away from you. He loves her to much, i'm not saying you dont you do but you get what i'm trying to say?" Phoenix asked.
"Yeah i do." He said.
"Don't take him away from her. Emilen needs Felix, they're good for each other. If you really love her you won't make her choose. I'm only saying." Phoenix replied as she opened the door and went outside.
Abel went to the window and looked out; Felix and Emilen were lying together Felix still in his wolf form Emilen curled around his side both sleeping out in the sun. Phoenix hopped into a tree and just stared at the setting sun, she looked at Onyx and who bobbed his head and headed to go find Cain. "Tomorrow..." Emilen whispered to a half dozing Felix, "I want to take you to see my parents."
Felix made a noise in the back of his throat that sounded like he agreed, 'Your memories will always live on Adalyn... Ryker and Rain.' Felix thought as he dozed off.
Today
Was the most horrible day of my life! It sucked and i feel like crap and i'm still pissed! Ahhhh why can't i go even one day without something bad happening!!!!!!!!!!!
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
It wasn't...
Meant to be i guess. I still blame myself a lot of things have happened Jenny knows and so does Angel and i dont really wanna post up here what happened. Yes i'm still a virgin! I know someone will end up asking that! but its fine whatever ya know? I guess i'm hurt but i'll survive. anyway i guess i just wanted to say that. i feel sad but i also feel relieved in a way. I feel bad but i dont know i guess i'm not so sure how i really feel. Suppose it'll hit me tomorrow like a ton of bricks! I really should come out of my little fantasy from time to time and see what's really going on.
I guess i kinda expected it so yesterday was my day to just cry to Angel and Jenny and i'm sorry if i bugged you Jenny. I'm sorta scared again about how everything will go down tomorrow. I mean i know they'll understand but i guess i just dont want the questioning gazes and to answer your question Blade i wasnt dating anyone. I wasnt even dating Aaron we just really liked each other but that never went very far. I still dont think i should even bring up any of my past, it seems like when i do people run away.
I'm still trying to get over some of the hurt from another guy who kept coming back but also i feel like i have a new hurt. I'm confused more than ever and i think i will be until i realize what i'm so confused about. Jenny if you dont wanna talk to me tonight cause more than likely i will dont answer k?
Sunday, March 22, 2009
Just wanna...
Blog! i guess i havent done enough except for the random writing but that doesnt really tell you about my day now does it? Anyway i dont know how i'm feeling right now, with Angel playing matchmaker for me i feel flattered yet afraid. I mean sooo i met this guy at Sara's who strangely enough has the same name as my bro! hahaha. They call him Turtle haha, anyway he's 2-3 years older than me i say 2-3 because my bro Aaron is 2 years olders than me and he's 19 and will be turning 20 in October and then i'll be 18 in December but anyway he just turned 20. He's sweet and last night well we really werent paying attention to Twilight.
He held my hand under the blanket we shared and i cannot begin to tell you how good that made me feel! I'm not even kidding, with my past guys they moved to far to fast! It skipped hand holding to them wanting something i told them wasnt gonna even happen so dont expect anything! So i'm not used to... hmmm a healthy relationship! he didnt ask me out but i mean we cuddled on the floor and throught the movie Jenny, and Sara and Angel would suddenly go 'Awww' and i'd look at the tv and Bella and Edward werent doing anything so i knew they had to be talking about us.
Apparently we made a heart on the floor by the way we were laying! Angel even asked me if i liked him and i said yeah and she asked if she could tell him, and i told her only if he liked me back. He said a bit and of course she gushed to him, he hugged me before he left and i went outside and kissed him on the cheek then said i should get back inside while i was searching for the door handle that seemed to had disappered!
I mean i really like him i do and he's sweet and i havent been held like that in goodness knows how long and it was just nice to feel like someone besides my friends acutually wanted me, not sexually but like wanted to bond ya know? With my other boyfriends it was like they wanted sex and after about a million no's they left! Thing is i've never had a healthy relationship with a guy besides friendship! And with one guy i ended up holding his hand not him reaching over and holding mine like Aaron did..... ok i might just use Turtle.... nah i'll use Aaron i'll say A-Ron for my bro k?
I'm not used to feeling really wanted by a guy! Ya know, it was nice and i got stuck in Sara's tree and if i had let go i would've fell on my back but he came up and held me so i let go and he didnt like immediatly just drop me to my feet he held me for a second or so and then after i looked away he let me go. I'm sure my face was really red and stayed red making that i liked him even more obvious. ok now i'm turning red i'm going to wrap this post up by saying.... PICKLE TREE! hahahaha didnt expect that did ya?
Friday, March 20, 2009
Random Writing part 5
Abel rammed Felix again this time hard enough that the big wolf lost his balance and fell next to Rune. "Cain, i can hear her! She's hurt!"
"Rune go get her you know where she's at!" Rune nodded and stood up. He got a running head start before leaping into the air and letting the breeze catch his wings.
Onyx followed the smell of burnt flesh and saw Sam, his brown hair up and his golden eyes open but not in terror he had accepted his death. He was tied to a stake, this wasn't because he was Seer everyone knew that it was because he had wanted to help Emilen. Onyx bowed his head to the ground for a moment in a silent show of respect and darted off toward the smell of smoke.
He saw the smoke first before the fire, he didn't need anyone to tell him what was going on because he knew. He ran up the steps to the cottage but was pulled down, he looked back to see people with worried expressions on their faces. Chains were in their hands as they lassoed him like a bull and pulled him back. 'Emilen.... I've failed you. I'm sorry.' He thought as he was dragged back so he could watch the burning.
Rune flew the forest he didn't have time on his side and he knew that. The forest thinned out and left him hanging in the air as the smell of death assaulted him. He flew past not knowing what was going on but the smell of fire kept him going and that was enough.
"Mother!" Emlien whimpered. She curled into a ball as the last of the exits caught fire, she was stuck in this house and she would burn along with it. She looked to the roof willing it to disappear so she might see the sky once more before she burned with the house. The roof broke in splinters and she saw wings descend and feet touch the ground, it was Rune.
To much smoke made her cough and sputter, "Rune?" She asked.
"Yeah I'm right here. Come on lets get you out, can you stand up?" He questioned. Emilen shook her head and Rune gently cradled her in his arms. He jumped up and let the wind take hold of his wings, he got them out of the house and close enough that Onyx would see he had Emlien but not so close the people would see. When he was able to settle down and set Emilen down without her falling they both saw something that would haunt them for the rest of their lives.
Rune's hand snaked out and he covered Emilen's mouth as she let out a scream that quickly turned into a sob. Her mother lay broken on the ground dead, and Sam was tied to a stake and burned. All because of her and what she was. Rune wrapped his arms around her waist and brought her to him, as she tried hard to escape and run to her mother. "No Emilen! They'll see us and we'll get hurt!" Rune said as he tried to drag her away.
Emilen's hands went up and her nails bit into Rune's hands, he let go but not before slapping her. He didn't have time to register what happened because she was on the ground next to her mother, crying and holding the dead woman's hand. "Mom, mom!" She screamed her words coming out hysterical.
Rune looked around for something to knock Emilen out with before they got caught. He heard the voices and tried to drag Emilen away but nothing would get her away. "Leave me alone!" She screamed. "Let me die with her!" Rune didn't say anything more just bowed and walked off leaving the girl he once loved to face death alone.
She looked up and seeing the men she smiled at them, it was one of pain and insanity. "I want to die." She giggled having lost all control of herself and everything around her.
One of the men reached out to grab her when Onyx burst through the men and stepped in front of her followed by Abel and Felix. Cain was last his shoes were gone and he made his way to Emilen, he helped her up and led her away while the wolves guarded there backs. Somewhere along the way Emilen's vision began to swim and she heard faint voices in the background strangely one sounded like Abel.
The water was dark and murky as she placed one toe in, looking closer she saw why that was. This wasn't water... it was blood. She looked around and saw her mother and father and Sam all dead and broken because of her. Rune was there and when she tried to talk to him he only slapped her away and called her a beast. He had no wings, that was she supposed when she realized she was dreaming. She woke up and felt Abel beside her, "Abel!" She whimpered pulling his arm up and scooting close enough so she could bury her face in his chest.
"I'm right here." He whispered pulling her to him.
"Don't leave me!" She cried. "Please, Abel I'm sorry please don't leave me!" She continued to sob. "Don't leave me! Don't leave like mom and Sam and Rune! Please!" She continued to sob into his chest.
"Shhhh. I'm not going anywhere. I'll be here for as long as you need me." He whispered sitting up enough to turn the beside lamp on. He rocked her back and forth whispering comforting words to comfort her.
"He left me." She said finally as she looked up into Abel's eyes.
Abel thought he knew who she was talking about but decided to ask. "Who?"
"Rune." She whispered her finger tracing the bruise that began to show under his eye. "What happened?"
"Nothing, Onyx and i were just messing around." Abel lied. That seemed good enough and Emilen settled back into the comfort of Abel's arms. In truth he had caught up with the pathetic excuse for a angel and they had gotten into a fight. Abel left with a black eye and Rune... he left with hurt pride and a few broken bones. Though he could easily heal he knew he had damaged his pride because he had Emilen, and he actually cared for her.
"Is she sleeping?" Felix asked as he poked his head in the room. Abel nodded and Felix padded in, "What if she wants to forget? Will you let her?" Felix asked knowing that there was a strong chance Emilen might want to forget.
"Yes." Abel replied squeezing Emilen's sleeping form a little tighter as he said it. And he meant it, "I just have to believe that if i let her forget... she'll still be my Emilen and she'll still love me as i love her."
"What if she doesnt?" Felix quizzed knowing that once Emilen forgot the pain she would forget the wolves as well.
"Then i did what she wished. I want her to be happy." He said. Emilen whimpered and her grip tightened around Abel, she had heard but she knew deep down the first time she had forgotten it hadnt been all because of her dad... Rune never really loved her like she did him and that hurt. She just wanted to forget the pain, like now she wanted to forget the pain, but knew she couldnt forget it without forgetting Abel... and she couldnt live without Abel or Felix. Or her whole family for that matter, sleep finally came to both of them Able's arms were still wound around her and he held her all through the night. The nightmares would come and go but Abel would stay... right? She could only hope.
Random Writing prt. 4
Abel sat there with his forgotten soda, Cain across from him and Onyx with his ear to the door. The only ones allowed in the house were Felix and Phoenix had given up along time ago and went him to relax. "She hasn't forgotten about you." Cain laughed, Abel's cheeks turned a bright red and threw the soda halfway across the yard in his frustration. Emilen had wanted to talk to Rune herself, and alone but Abel had put up such a fight that Felix chewed him out and tugged a stunned Emilen inside.
"So you don't care that Abel killed your father?" Rune asked reaching out to hold one of Emilen's hands but stopped when he saw Felix stand up. Felix sat back on the stair step and continued to glare at Rune.
"I guess i did at one point but i mean when you really love someone you just don't care about what they did... i suppose it was for the best to i mean." Emilen said absently staring out the window.
"I know what you mean." Rune responded after a minute. "Emilen can i ask you something?" At her nod Rune continued, "Do you remember me? At all even a little?"
"Yeah i do now, I'm sorry i asked you to wipe my memory i just couldn't handle it. I loved you and you knew it was going to happen didn't you?" Rune nodded and Emilen stopped as a silent tear made its way down her cheek. "Why didn't you tell me?!" She cried.
"Sam told me the night before he had a vision! And he didn't want to upset you because he didn't think it was real! He'd been getting false visions for the past week and he didn't think anything of it! Emilen I'm sorry i should have told you but i didn't think it was real either! I didn't tell you because i love you!" Rune exclaimed.
Felix cracked his neck and then his knuckles as if waiting for Rune to say something else to make Emilen cry so he could pounce on him and rip his throat out. His eyes narrowed and the color washed from them leaving them a blood red. He shook his head and chided his spirit wolf. "Rune, i love..." She took a steadying breath to calm her and tried again, "I loved you," 'And still do.' Her mind whispered. "But i love Abel." She continued as if trying to reason with herself and not just Rune. "I have to go." With that she was up and out of the door, Felix stood up and smiled his best toothy smile before leaping out of his skin and into the wolf's skin and onto Rune.
"Felix!" Came a sharp and commanding call. "Don't!" It was Cain. Felix didn't listen, he hadn't listened to anyone but Emilen since she had arrived. Felix's sharp nails poked through his paws and swiped at the angel leaving a bloody mess as the angel fought back.
Rune jumped out from under Felix's paws and flew to the air where he had the advantage, or so he thought. Rune pulled out a sword and landed back on the ground, the sword glinted in the fluorescent light and as Felix charged him Rune dove outside so Cain's house wouldn't get hurt. Felix dove again nearly missing the angel's wings, he spun and kicked off from a tree and headed barling back to the angel.
Rune jumped up his wings opening and hovering before the breeze that came. Felix growled and charged again this time jumping and catching the angel once again with his enormous paws. Abel torn between going after Emilen and helping Felix stood there his eyes shifting back and forth from the pinned angel to the forest where Emilen had gone to. "Get Felix! I got Emilen!" Onyx shouted jumping over the huge wolf and landing as a wolf himself.
His clothes strapped to his leg Onyx headed down the forest looking and smelling for any signs of Emilen. He could smell fear and hatred that made a strong enough scent for him to follow.
Emilen ran through the village till she came to a small cottage, anger for the death of her father and anger that she had to forget who she was made her open the door. Sam sat in a chair his back to Emilen, Adalyn sat across from him at the table. "Emilen!" Adalyn said a smile lighting her face.
"Mother!" Emilen cried leaving her anger at the door as she ran to her mom. "Mother look! Look i have wings!" Emilen cried delighted that she could confide in her mother.
"Wings? But no... Sam told me you were a wolf... a werewolf." Adalyn replied standing up. "You are one of them!" Her mother shouted. "You are a beast!"
"Mother no... mom I'm not... please believe me! Mom!" Emilen cried.
Adalyn walked towards her daughter spouting curses, she slapped her on the cheek hard enough that she fell to the ground. "This village... this place was founded by wolves! We are there descendants! I knew i should have had Ryker kill Rune when he had the chance, the angels have been aganist us all this time taking sides with the demons! And you are one of them! You are from hell, you are a demon!" Her mother shouted.
"Adalyn calm down! She's not a demon!" Sam tried to explain but the door burst open. Hoping it was Abel, Emilen turned to see men. They held ropes and torches and screamed for her mother to get out. Adalyn ran out of the cottage as the men grabbed Sam and drug him out as well, they closed the door and set it on fire and all the other exits they could reach so Emilen couldnt get out.
"Mother! Mother no!" She cried tears streaming down her cheeks.
Onyx lifted his nose to the air and sniffed. He could smell fire and burnt flesh... 'Emilen!' With that thought clear in his head he ran as fast as his legs would carry him. 'I hope i'm not to late!'



